BY: BRENDAN DIMITRI
It’s been six days, and the abomination of Jay Feely’s recycled sob-story takes from Tuesday still linger like a stale fart.
I would rather listen to Paris Hilton give her thoughts on the, “Theory of Pessimism,” than have to sit through another game with Jay Freaking Feely in the booth.
It Ain’t All Flowers:
…”sometimes ya gotta feel the thorns” Stu Simpson says. If we take anything from Tuesday’s Bills vs Titans dud, it’s that this didn’t have the same sting that big losses of yesteryear had. The thorns have been dulled by the course grit of JA17!
We’ve yet to see Allen unravel for series at a time this year, and while Malcolm Butler’s interception left us scratching our heads, it’s evident that if last week is his current floor, we’re headed northbound in the passing lane.
One to Remember:
Tonight’s tilt vs Mahomes & Co. could very well be a preview of a 2nd-round playoff match-up. Based on New England’s low-energy performance vs Yung Lock, the division looks like ours to lose through five. Suffice to say this game is a biggum.
Can somebody make sure to @ the NFL sound engineers, and offer $50 on a Venmo to make sure they crank that simulated crowd noise to 11? WEEEEEEW I’m harder than AP Calc just thinking of what 71,000 would sound like @ The Ralph on the first KC 3rd-down.
We’ve been robbed.
Dear Roger:
You’re missing a big opportunity to get that dwell time up during halftime. Here me out here: Players leave the field for halftime, Allen & Mahomes emerge from the tunnel, each coming out to a song of their choice, line up at the goal-line and simultaneously throw the ball as far as they can to see who reigns supreme.
Give us this day our daily thread. I’d take Allen +175 all day.
Question … What would Allen’s walk-up song be? Tweet us your thoughts @TrainwreckSprts.
Dear Le’Veon Bell:
Dear Boss:
If you’re a boss around WNY, and you don’t let your subordinates scoot from work a little early to catch kickoff, you deserve a write up. We’ll all work an extra hour tomorrow.
@West Coast Folks, we highly recommend faking a migraine around 2pm EST.
Me? I’ll be work-from-home cracking open a Hamburg Brewing Company’s Blackberry Gose right around 10am PST.
Where We At?:
The Bills have a lot to prove, and the money is coming in for KC (opened @ -3.5, now -4.5), but i’m thinking upset folks. I’m thinking Brown for 65 and a touchdown folks. I’LL TELL YEW WHAT, I’m thinking JA17 goes up to Pat Mahomes pre-game and whispers in his ear, “I’m your huckleberry.”
40-38 BUFFALO
BIG BOOT BASS w/ the GAME WINNER as time expires. LET’S GOOOOOOOO.
… speaking of Sturgill, for a good time, peep his new bluegrass CD, Cuttin’ Grass Vol 1.
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